22 November 2008

Poor little Spence....

He's just not himself at the moment. Last night we had a pretty rough night. He woke up every hour and a half from when we put him to put and his little face was red hot. We took his temperature at about 10pm and it was 39 degrees! The poor little thing was just beside himself, he was munching on his hands and had so much dribble happening and was just so tired but not sleeping. We gave him some paracetamol which helped the temp but he still didn't sleep much. THe best we got was a three hour stretch between 2.30am and 5.30am.
He's been really grizzly today as well. It's awful to see him like this, so unhappy we can barely get a smile from him and he's usually such a happy little thing...
He's not really drinking much and hasn't eaten alot either today which worries me. We've just got him off to bed but have decided when he wakes tonight we'll feed him given that he hasn't drank anything pretty much all day. I do hope he gets better soon.
I tell you what though - if i don't see some teeth soon (given that everyone says this is teething) - then I am gonna....i'm gonna.....yeah, i don't know what!! I'm just gonna!!

21 November 2008

Night 4....and maybe teeth....??

Little Spence was a bit unsettled last night, even before we'd gone to bed he'd woken up once and had a bit of a cry. We could hear him making little noises here and there in the evening and he just seemed to not be able to go into a deep sleep.
He woke up a couple of times overnight, but only just required a bried little pat and back off to sleep. No massive crying or feeding required!

This morning he is dribbling his head off, grizzling most of the day and has a snuffly, snotty nose....dare i say it.....teething????
So far, every time he has dribbled, grizzled, had red cheeks, etc...poeple have given their expert judgement that he is teething...this has been since he was about 3 months old....needless to say it's a bit of a joke around here that every little thing that happens or he does is put down to 'teething'....maybe this time is the real thing though???

20 November 2008

Night 3

THe little boy is doing so well! Last night, after being so tired that he wouldn't drink his bottle going to bed, I thought we could be in for a bit of waking up when he realised he was hungry later. He went to bed at 7pm and then didn't wake up at all until about 4am. It took only two times of going in to shh and pat him - a total of about 10min before he went back to sleep until 7.15am!! What a star! I'm so pleased that this hasn't turned out to be too traumatic for him. He woke up happy as ever this morning - and so did we! I know it's only night 3 but it sure looks like he's got the hang of getting himself back to sleep easily when he wakes. I'm really pleased we made the decision to do this.

19 November 2008


We've taken drastic action! Spence has been waking up earlier and earlier these days. He used to sleep until anywhere from 5.30am to 7am when we'd feed him and put him back to bed for a couple more hours. The last five weeks or so he's been waking earlier, more like 3.30am, so we'd been feeding him and putting him back to bed. Then he started to wake at 12.30am and 4am or so. We just did what we'd always done and fed him both times. Little alarm bells in my head were saying 'we're developing a bad habit here'. He doesn't need to food overnight, in fact, he often wouldn't even finish the bottles, plus he already has three meals a day as well as 4 bottles. I think we were just reinforcing for him that when he woke up, we give him a cuddle and a feed and he goes back to sleep, meaning we had no other real way of getting him back to sleep than feeding. Not to mention how tired it was making us which is hard as we're both working 4 days a week.

Anyway, we decided that we might have to address this. We talked to our MCHN and decided that we would try the 'controlled comforting' approach from now on when he wakes at night. So we started two nights ago, our progress so far goes like this:

NIGHT 1: We were all geared up full of motivation ready to start our new regime. We decided that we had to commit to at least a week of the controlled comforting approach to see if it made a difference. Kylie had just finished her work for the week and has 4 days off, so we figured now was the time! Little Spence went off to bed as usual at about 7pm and we went to bed early in anticipation of the long night ahead! Spence woke up at 12.30am as he had been the last few nights and so we waited until he was crying rather than just grizzling. Then Ky went in and just gave him a little talking to and a pat and some soothing words.
He wasn't impressed. He wanted a bottle, he wanted to be picked up....She stayed in there for a few minutes then came out. He cried. We waited for 2 mintues then went back in, soothing words, patting, shhh-ing and then left again. He cried. We waited 4 minutes, back in then out, 6 minutes, back in then out, 8 minutes, back in then out, 10 minutes, back in then out, 12 minutes, back in then out. All the while he cried his poor little head off. We hated it but just tried to remain strong and remember that in the long run it would be better. Finally after an hour he went back to sleep.
He woke up again at 4 and we went through the same ordeal. It was really hard and tiring for everyone. He really ramped his crying up and when he fell asleep after an hour and a half it was only for 10 minutes or so. We finally got him up and gave him a bottle at 5.30am. He then went back to sleep for a few hours after that, whilst i headed to work with a headache, feeling very tired and traumatized from the ordeal. Spence was fine though!

NIGHT 2: Had to psyche ourselves up to do it all again night 2, reinforcing our committment to a week before we pulled the pin on it if we couldn't handle it or saw no change. Went to bed early again and geared up for the long night.
Spence woke up at 1am. We waited till he was crying not just grizzling before i went in. I talked quietly to him, pulled the blankets up and gave him a pat and some shhh-ing. Then when he was quiet i said goodnight and left the room. He immediately started to cry and I went back to our room to wait out the few minutes before i'd go in again. But low and behold - he quietened down and went back to sleep!! I'd only been in there once!! He slept till 5.15am and then started to make some little noises and the odd cry, but kept going back to sleep! We ended up feeding him at 6am - he wasn't full on crying just half-crying but thought it was a reasonable time so we fed him. Success on night 2!! I feel fantastic after having so much sleep!!
We're well aware it's just night 2 so this may not be the new pattern yet, but at least we had some immediate success to keep us motivated! Will keep you posted on the next few nights progress.

14 November 2008

ART Bill 2008 Update

The Assisted Reproductive Technology Bill was debated in the Upper House this week.

After debate over the last three days a vote on the second reading was held and passed - 20 for to 18 against - it doesn't get much closer than that! The bill has now been referred to the Legislative Committee (3 ALP, 2 Libs, 1 Nat and 1 Green) for discussion, consideration of amendments etc. They will report back to the Parliament on 2 December, after which the Bill will go to a third reading and final vote (some time during that week, the final sitting of Parliament for the year). I think that it is a positive sign that it went to Committee as it may not have been supported in it's current form in a final vote and there have been a number of credible amendments raised.

There was a great speech by a Liberal Party member, Mr Bruce Atkinson, last night (yes, Liberal Party!!) supporting our families - which is great to see. I wrote a letter to Mr Atkinson thanking him and saying that the Liberal Party could do with more good people like himself! There was terrible speech by Inga Peulich (Liberal) pretty much saying how our families were inferior and children needed to be protected from circumstances such as our - am astounded at how simple some people's little minds are....

With the vote so close, the Christian right will no doubt be stepping up it's campaign to stop this legislation so we will also be continuing to lobby for support over the next few weeks. I am hopeful that the right outcome will prevail here but you just never know.

Listening to parliament has been quite educational, both in terms of politics and political process but also, sadly, in terms of the level of prejudice that still exists in our society, some of the Liberal and National Party member speeches have just been appalling. It's funny because i don't often come face to face with people who think like this, but it seems there are quite a lot of them - just under half of the upper house anyway!

07 November 2008

November and politics

Just another quick one - busy working today!
Little Spence is going great, he's talking (well you konw - making sounds) - ironically, his first decipherable sound seems to be 'dadadada'- this must just be the easiest sound for him because, as you can imagine, we didn't teach him that one!!! I keep saying to him 'mum mum mum', 'bub bub bub', 'nan nan nan' - and he just laughs and says 'da da da'!! It's hilarious.

On the political front, the ART Bill resumes debate next week. We are really concerned that it's not going to get passed, it is looking so tight. It will be just so disappointing as it could then be years before Spencer gets the same rights as other kids. It is just so unfair and makes me really angry when i think about it. The Victorian Law Reform Commissions report recommends the law needs to change, all research indicates that children of same sex families do just as well as other children - there is no reason for this bill being turned down other than plain old ignorance and prejudice.

Here is the world currently so proud of itself with electing Barrack Obama to the whitehouse, everyone talking about how far we've come in terms of equality. Pah! It seems gay is the new black - and let me assure you, we're still at the back of the bus.